The good, the bad and the stinky
Updated: May 26, 2021
Edit: The first three post's of my new blog were originally written in early summer of 2020.
My name is Chris and this is my first shot at making a blog. I wanted to capture the up's, downs, the good, the bad and the stinky as it pertains to being a new dad. Now I must admit, I have been a dad for about 7 months now, however, I am still going through many firsts. I hope this blog helps guide other new dads out there in the big world. I have to say, the first 7 months have been relatively easy. My baby girl has spoiled her mom and I rotten, as we her.
Starting from the beginning. I have to admit, I felt as though I was the luckiest guy in the world when I found out I was going to be a dad. I immediately felt this immense joy, pride and sense of accomplishment. At that point in my life, I had lived through many up's and down's, mostly down's and this was the first real "win" I felt in a long time. I am being honest when I say, I was not scared or nervous (that came later). Throughout the first months of my girlfriend, now wife, being pregnant, I felt this feeling of love that I had never felt before. I had been married previously, but the love I felt in that marriage paled in comparison to the love I felt for the woman that was carrying my child. Now guys, don't get me wrong, I am not saying having a child fixes anything, but they do have their own way of making things seemingly better, at least in my situation anyways.
Here is my advice for the first few months of finding out you are going to be a dad.
SAVE, SAVE, SAVE and SAVE some more! The old adage of babies being expensive, well that is certainly an understatement. Once you find out you are going to be a dad, save as much money as physically possible. Do you smoke? Well quit that habit! Here in southern Illinois, a pack of smokes costs just shy of $10 per pack. Quit that habit boys and you will save yourself an extra $300 a month, or about $3650 per year. I know what you are thinking, I just found out I am going to be a dad and I am stressed out, how am I supposed to quit? Well, answer, just do it. You are a man about to have a kid, if you wont quit for yourself, then quit for them!
Treat your significant other like they are royalty. Let's get real serious here boys, your female partner will be doing all the work from here on out, all the way up to delivery. This is not the time for you to be out hanging with the boys, this is the time for you to step up and get serious. Your significant other will be changing mentally and physically. She will be growing a human from the size of a single cell to the size of a football or bigger. You need to be there for her. Yes, that includes the late night trips to the market for a jar of pickles and a bag of chocolate. This is the LEAST you can do for her.
When the time comes and there will be at least ONE time, admit you are wrong. Whether you are right, wrong or indifferent, now is not the time to be bullheaded. Go along with the program. If you have to grit your teeth and force a smile do it! Momma and baby are going through changes and the last thing you want to do is stress out momma bear. It will be bad for mom and baby, but it will be worse for you.
Remember, when coming up with names for your baby. Make a list. Don't just come up with the first thing that comes to mind. Agree to disagree. Make it a team effort. She wants a great name for your unborn child just as much as you do.
Remember men, if you are reading this post, more than likely you are a new dad. I will add insight and advice as much as possible. The list above are the top things I could come up with, but the list is not exhaustive. Remember, it took two to tango and make that baby, now is the time to step up into the role your significant other expects. Now is not the time to panic, now is the time to plan. Treat your girl like she is your queen, bend over backwards if you have to because you are not the one carrying the baby and you don't have to birth said baby, she does! There are going to be plenty of the good, the bad and the stinky moments coming, prepare!